Grand times: Remembering Octobers past and present (10-3-25)
- wwsmith6410
- Dec 31, 2025
- 4 min read
Updated: Jan 7
“Life starts all over again when it gets crisp in the fall.”
- F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby
Dear October,
You were my wife’s favorite month. Mine, too.
There are many reasons why. Fall colors. Cooler days and crisp nights. Pumpkins. Halloween. Our son, Alex, was born in October. So was my late father.
Alex and his wife, Lauren, will celebrate their sixth wedding anniversary with you this month. It seems like it was only a short time ago that Alex was dancing with his mom to Tom Petty’s “Wildflowers” after the wedding. And we’ll have another wedding anniversary to celebrate this year. Our daughter, Baylee, and Justin were married the last time you rolled around on the calendar.
October, you also will bring us the World Series, a Harvest Moon on Oct. 6 and the 52nd Annual National Shrimp Festival in Gulf Shores, Oct. 9-12.
And I met Dorinda in October 42 years ago. So, October, you’re grand.
Admittedly, it was hard to see you arrive this year. You see, for the first time since 1983 I entered October without my Bear. I lost Dorinda to cancer in April. But as the quote above this column reflects, life starts all over again.
For me, it is in seeing the world through our three grandchildren’s eyes. That’s what Dorinda wanted me to do – enjoy living the rest of my life and let her see our grandbabies through my eyes. I did recently when two of our grandchildren – Ann Evelyn and Wallace – visited me on the white sandy beaches of Gulf Shores with their mom and dad.
Let me tell you a little bit about Wallace. Seems like he just avoided crawling and walking and went straight to running. To see the 17-month-old little fellow come running toward me grinning and screaming “Pop Pop” helps to heal my heart. It also warms my heart to hear that 3-year-old Ann Evelyn – an angel – prays each night for her Dee Dee to get better. She also asks her dad when we can bring Dee Dee home.
It hurts that Dorinda wasn’t here with me to enjoy our grandbabies. But I know she was watching as we made the most of our time together. We ushered in fall with two wonderful days at the beach. We enjoyed seafood from several of the great restaurants in the area. Of course, there was some time for beach photos against a perfect sun-kissed sky. They wrapped up their visit with a trip to the Alabama Gulf Coast Zoo.
As they left and you arrived, I reflected back on October 2024, the last one with my Bear.
Dorinda was undergoing a series of 25 radiation treatments zeroed in on an orange-sized cancerous tumor. She was sick and in pain - couldn't sit, stand or rest. Baylee’s wedding date was scheduled for late October. If the wedding would have been earlier in the month, Dorinda would not have been able to make the trip to Tennessee for the ceremony. Nobody knew how much pain she was in, inside and out. But Dorinda was adamant in seeing the wedding plans go forward.
Two weeks into the treatments, her radiation doctor gave us some hope. Smiling and waving for me to join him in the hallway of the radiology center in Prattville, the doctor said the tumor had shown a dramatic response to the treatments. It was early, but he said he was flabbergasted with the initial results.
Dorinda's pain gradually eased, but her sickness continued as October sped ahead. Wedding plans sped ahead, too. And life happened. All three of our grandbabies were sick during the month. There were trips to the hospital for them, breathing treatments and one surgery. Dorinda also lost her job as the architect she worked for retired.
October, you were looking like just a gloomy prelude to winter. Indeed, even as wedding day arrived, it was raining as I sat in my car looking at the outdoor wedding venue of the Dancing Bear Lodge in Townsend, Tennessee. Dorinda, my brave Bear, was able to make the trip. She was with Baylee helping her get dressed. I was waiting for the first look.
We were a couple hours away from the ceremony when I watched a flurry of orange leaves come fluttering to the ground ahead of the rain. And then, like a baseball team rallying in the ninth inning, so too did you, October.
The sun started to shine, lifting the shade on a brilliant fall day. With our oldest grandson Rhys on her left and me on her right, I walked our daughter down the aisle. I gave her away and then sat next to my beautiful bride of 38 years. She smiled at me.
A ray of sunshine glittered across the gazebo as the small ceremony proceeded. Someone said afterward that it was the grandparents we had lost letting us know they were there. The evening concluded after enjoying food, music and fun with our family and friends. Baylee danced with her mom to Petty’s “Free Fallin’.” It was a great night and one of the last times we were all together.
On top of the world, we made our way down the mountains of Tennessee as October wound down. However, there were more mountains to climb in the months ahead. Too many.
My Bear enjoyed Thanksgiving and Christmas with our children and grandchildren, who she called her greatest accomplishment. But her cancer spread as we entered 2025. After a long hospital stay in April, Dorinda was at home for Easter with all three grands. I lost her less than a week later.
So, as you arrive again, know that there will be hard moments this month. But I’ll also reflect on memories of our Octobers together, past and present. Birthday celebrations. Trick or treating with our little ones. And weddings.
October, you’re still grand. Welcome back.
Wayne
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